The black dog has been making me feel particularly rubbish today. Worthless and useless are two words that seem to be playing on repeat, on my internal CD player.
A useless failure.
I knew the black dog had been waiting for me, and today he took his opportunity to pounce. Alone, tired, and a little bit vulnerable, that's always the perfect time for the black dog to get me. Bastard.
But after having a good old chat/moan to Mr B, he told me this:
"How you feel is not who you are."
Wise words Mr B.
Wise words.
I just get so incredibly FRUSTRATED with my brain.
Why oh why do I find life so overwhelmingly difficult?
Some people seem to coast along on the beautiful sunlit highroad, whilst I trip, stumble and fall along the stony overgrown path.
"I'll take the high road, and you take the low road, and I'll be in Scotland before you!"
Was that the song I used to sing as a little girl? When my Dad had helped me climb to the top of a wall and I carefully skipped along, loving being higher than anyone else.
But maybe the high road isn't always the best.
Yes, you might get to Scotland before me, but actually, I'm not that bothered about going.
Ha!
(Super impressed that I have made myself laugh, whilst making a deep and meaningful connection to a random old song that just seemed to pop in my head...)
xxx
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