But not tonight.
Or this week in fact.
Because I have officially caught the Olympic bug, and I'm so proud to be from Great Britain.
Each day I have been glued to my TV, overwhelmed by the strength and guts that our sportsmen and women are showing. The are truly incredible.
They remind me that anything is possible.
That through sheer grit and determination, you can make dreams come true.
And its not just the gold medallists I'm talking about here. I'm talking about all of the British team, the competitors that keep going, striving for more, even when a medal is beyond their reach.
No matter what we do in life, we need to be reminded that mountains can be climbed, the unachievable can be achieved, that situations will change, and that there will always be hope, even in darkness.
This time last year I would never have been able to plan a holiday, go on a plane, go out for dinner, talk to strangers. I honestly thought I wouldn't ever be able to do those things again. But I have. I've kept going, I've found strength, and I've refused to let the black dog win.
I may have to live with this depression for the rest of my life, I don't know. But what I do know, is that I won't stop fighting. I have been to the darkest place imaginable, and there is no way I want to be there again.
And that strength that I have discovered, hasn't just come from within. Its been fed to me through friends, family, strangers, art, beauty and nature. Drip... drip... drip... gradually its sunk into me. Seeing other peoples progress, being able to sympathise with a person on a whole new level, letting an encouragement register in my brain, every little drip has made me stronger.
And tonight, these lyrics by Gary Go from his song Wonderful (which I've wittered on about before..) just seem to be repeating in my head...I don't want to forget them, and I don't want you to forget them either...
"We are all miracles,
wrapped up in chemicals,
We are incredible,
don't take it for granted,
We are all miracles,
We are WONDERFUL..."