Blogging late at night is never the best idea. You're a bit more sleepy, and your mind is in some kind of limbo... Thoughts seem to dance in front of your eyes even more than usual. Some sinking in, others lingering for a few minutes, and a dozen more darting around like little maniac racing cars.... But I didn't want to go to bed without scribbling a few things down...Even if I'm talking absolute bollocks...
Actually, now I'm not even writing anything, I'm stupidly looking at photos on facebook. I really should stop doing that. Never makes me feel good. Well, sometimes it does. But generally it brings up those horrible mean twins; 'jealousy' and 'envy'. Yuk. Don't like those twinnies. They can go away now please. They're always joined by their friend 'comparison' too. Whom I equally don't like.
Why do I have to compare my life with others? I don't know. Its irritating.
Why am I envious of other people? Again, I don't know. But I think its because they're all probably having an AWESOME time (small hint of sarcasm there...)
But honestly, I really piss myself off when the twins come along and sit next to me making my brain go a bit funny and lopsided.
Because they make other peoples lives seem perfect, and happy, and amazing, and everything, but in reality....thats probably not 100% true.
In fact, if I was good at maths, I could probably work out the statistics and tell you that statistically, at some point, rubbish stuff happens in everyones lives. Yeh. Must get that maths up to scratch then I can have some scientific proof.
Now I'm worrying I sound mean...Do I sound mean?
Think I just want to reassure myself that no-one really has got it 'sorted'. (If you have, I will come and poke you with a large stick.)
And perhaps, its quite exciting that we never know whats round the corner, whether it be good or bad. It could be an ice cream van giving away screwball scrambles (which for me, would actually be bad, as I'm allergic to dairy....) OR it could be a giant new shoe shop with a massive sale on (if you didn't have feet, this would probably be a bit rubbish for you...)